Boogers...

Yep. That's right folks, we have young children so eventually the topic was going to come up. A few days back I told Ashley to get her finger out of her nose. We were at home, and I asked her nicely to please go to the bathroom and get a tissue. I thought this was really one of those non-debatable corrections. You know like, the kind where she just knows I am right, accepts the feedback and moves on. Oh wait, she is a pre-teen there is no such thing. However, I think she got me on this one.

"Why?"
I respond, "Because picking your nose is gross Ash, you need to use a tissue." (OBVIOUSLY!)
she counters, "You picked your nose yesterday in the car...I SAW you!"
(Irrational step mom considers...
I think, recall, and yes remember that perhaps that did happen. But wait...I had a cold, we were going in somewhere, I couldn't just leave it...I didn't have a tissue...and its MY car...did she really see me...and honestly, I cannot be as wrong as Ashley. I MUST WIN!)

I reply, calmly, coolly, and with authority, "Ashley it is fine to pick your nose in YOUR OWN car if you do not have a tissue available. It is WRONG to pick your nose at home, when there are tissues in the bathroom."

And that, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, is my closing argument! And I walked out of the room as she continued to pick her nose.